Intro + Aardvark

Right...

Blogging...


It had to happen eventually, it was either start a Blog or go on Facebook. I think I chose the lesser of two evils.

Anyway, I was going to do something brilliant for this opening post but I couldn't think of anything and out of sheer desperation I started Google searching words in dictionary order, I was mildly surprised with Aardvark.

So without further ado:

Aardvark on Google:

The first web site was the wikipedia entry so I skipped that (I didn't want to learn about Aardvarks!)
The next URL was www.vark.com and the caption read.
'Ask questions, get *live* answers from your network! Aardvark finds the perfect person to answer any question in real-time.'
I was shocked, the second website Google coughs up is not actually about the lovable cuddly Aardvark!! :(
In side the site there is a text box in which you type a question, the website then apparently finds the perfect person to answer and sends you their response in a few minutes.
Of course this sounded like a challenge to me and I immidiately typed the question.
'Why?'
Unfortunately an Aardvark icon appeared with a speech bubble saying

Oops - that doesn't look like a question!

Please try again... Just write your question as a plain English sentence, like you would to a friend.

What!!! I did phrase it as I would a friend!!! I reasoned that the Aardvark must be lonely so I promptly asked:

'Are you doing anything later?'

Once again the helpful Aardvark appeared saying:

'Oops - that question is too short for Aardvark!

Try adding more detail so people know what you're looking for…'

Now I was intrigued, the Aardvark was speaking in some kind of code, but obviously wanted me to explain my intentions. That was going to be difficult, but I worked around the problem.
I'm looking for a nice furry lovable sort of being to be my soul mate. Know you of such a being :P?
Maybe I should have left the :P out...
However the Aardvark understood!!!
He took me to a pop-up and said that before he could find an answer I had to sign in.
With that I understood! This was a dating site, cunningly disguised as a Q&A center. I hate dating sites. I removed the pop up and told the Aardvark we were through.
'You Bastard! How could you do such a thing to me?'
Just to rub it in he sent me to the pop-up again, I was about to furiously storm from the site when I noticed a small button entitled
Example questions
So, to try to do the site justice, I clicked it.

• Product recommendations…
  What’s the best iPhone app to get breaking news reports?
• Local activities…
  Does anyone have any suggestions for a fun weekend activity in Philadelphia, PA?
• Book suggestions…
  Can anyone recommend a great book about value investing that’s easily understandable to a newbie?
• Travel tips…
  I’m going to Berlin for two weeks and would like to take some day trips to places that aren’t too touristy. Where should I go?
• Gift ideas…
  Any ideas for a graduation gift? I want to give my friend something that lasts, but someone already gave her jewelry. What else could I give her?
• Getting started on a project…
  How do I go about finding out if my invention is patentable?

Aha! Example question 2 proves it! A dating site, for Usans no less!

The next site on the list was Google images, which I skipped.
It was followed by
 www.awf.org > wildlife
With a subtext which read:
Provides details about the physical characteristics, diet, and habitat, of this mammal. [Orycteropus afer]
This sounded promising, maybe I could actually read about Aardvarks rather than flirt with them.
I was taken to a page with a picture of an Aardvark at night and a mass of intelligent looking writing. However I began to lose faith in the page almost instantly when I saw an ad part way through the first paragraph giving me the opportunity to strengthen Zambia's lower Zambezi national park and with a link entitled
'more action opportunities'
 How dare they!!! Not only have they assumed that I support lower Zambezi, when everyone knows I root for upper Zambezi every time (Go UZ!! WOO!). But once again I have been propositioned by an Aardvark!!! NO! I do not want more action opportunities. I was seriously put off and quickly scrolled to the end of the page where I noticed a heading which perked my curiosity.
It was a 'Did you know?' section and I always love these for there magnificently quirky and amusing lesser known facts. With a beating heart I read the two facts, and was thoroughly dissapointed.

• The aardvark has fewer teeth than most mammals. The teeth are columnar in shape, have no roots and do not grow simultaneously.
• Although not thought to be teritorial, females seem to become attached to a particular place. The males wander more. Adult aardvarks are usually solitary, coming together only for mating.

An in depth description of teeth and an overview of their social habits! Where were the humerous sex related tidbits such as 'Pedophilia is rife amongst Aardvarks' The website designers clearly had no sense of humour and had wasted a good opportunity. Bypassing the 'More action opportunities' sign I moved on to the next website.

The link simply said 'aardvark' and the URL was aardvark.tce.rmit.edu.au/
I was interested already! Obviously it was a school called Aardvark although I couldn't figure out the tce.rmit bit. The sub text however put me off to know end:
'Documents the contemporary architecture of Melbourne and surrounding regions'
Arrrrgh! Not only was it a website on Australian Architecture, but it was Victorian Ewwww!
Oh, well I at least felt secure in the thought that I was unlikely to be propositioned in this site.

The site was very bland, A white background with AARDVARK written in massive letters. Underneath this it stated: The RMIT guide to contemporary Melbourne architecture. In very fancy letters (Posh tossers). So that cleared the RMIT bit up I still saw no sign of a TCE though.
There was a link further down which said Access Aardvark which was a shame because if it had said Enter the Aardvark instead I could have proved my thought from the last paragraph wrong.

Once I had Accessed Aardvark I was taken to a very posh new page which included the first part of the site which did have sexual innuendo qualities. A link entitled Norman Day's Companion Article.

The link took me to a page which contained, what they called, an introductory essay by Norman. This 'essay' however only consisted of 98 words so I don't know where they get off calling it an essay. Stupid pompous Vics always looking for the quick and easy solution, never done a days work in their lives. (I have included the essay at the end of this post). There were more links down the bottom of the page from which I could go to the next page the previous page or the home page. But, embracing the simpleness of Firefox, I just clicked the little x button at the top of the tab.

And so ends my first foray into the world of blogging. Hopefully both of the people who read this have managed to avoid giving up at some point and will come back for the next installment in which I shall Google search Aardwolf.

If for any reason you wish to comment privately to me I can be reached at:
katethepotatoman@yahoo.com.au

-Kate


The period 1970 to 1986 was one of revolutionary change in Melbourne architecture. Globally the period was marked by a critical re-appraisal of the tenets of modern[ist] architecture which was seen as aesthetically exhausted and culturally fatally flawed.
Locally, the death in 1971 of Robin Boyd, who had championed the cause of modernism and fought against what he saw as the populist excesses of suburban taste, was strongly symbolic of this paradigm shift.
By 1986 the culture of the city had been redirected and the change was reflected in a number of signpost buildings and associated architectural occurrences.
Did you enjoy that as much as I did?