I wasn't looking forward to this search as I assumed that all I would find would be a myriad of wildlife info sites.
Fortunately I was mistaken.
Firstly the dictionary definition for Aardwolf is:
'n. a striped, hyena-like African mammal, Proteles cristatus, which feeds on carrion and insects.'
Which basically taught me everything I needed to know. Regardless I duly typed Aardwold in to Google search and Google, being the know all that it is, ignored my request and displayed the results for Aardwolf instead. This confused me until I noticed that I had typed Aardwold in the search box. I was about to proceed with the Google results for Aardwolf when I realised. Aardwold comes first alphabetically! So I scorned Google for thinking it knew best and clicked the link to search for Aardwold instead.
Amazingly Google found 485 results for Aardwold which was more than I was expecting. The first couple seemed to be about some online game called Aardwolf, which I ignored as A) I don't like online games and B) I would probably find this game when I search for Aardwolf. The next four hits were all from fineartamerica.com and concerned the sale of Aardwold Posters, Photos, Prints and Greeting Cards. Now this was interesting. I immediately entered the site and found only two pictures for sale, both of which were of Aardwolfs! That is hardly fair, I raged, The owners of this website are deliberately misleading the public by making out like they have Aardwold pictures for sale when in fact they do not. However I was not too annoyed as I reasoned that the FBI would rumble them sooner or later and the crime of 'misleading the public on a global scale in an art site' is still covered by the death penalty in all of Usa. Smiling fondly as I picture the site leaders swinging from the gallows I moved on.
The next site actually caused me to emit a semi-violent noise of amusement. It was from wiki.answers.com and the question was:
What does an Aardwold eat?
Aha, I thought, now I would finally find out about the real Aardwold and not the stupid Proteles Cristatus!
Unfortunately there was no answer. However, in the interests of a more knowledgeable public I resolved to answer this question myself. So I Google searched 'Aardwold Food' and discovered that Canadian Health Inspectors was the correct answer, so I typed it in the box. It asked me to prove I was human by typing anistestu policy into another box and away the answer went.
Once again I smiled fondly, this was turning into a productive session.
Before I left the site I scrolled through the 'related questions' section and found, to my surprise a question of a deeply philosophical nature.
The question: 'What does eat eat eat mean?'
The answer: 'To eat a lot'
So now you know.
The next site also made me laugh. The link read:
'Aardwold Alpacas is the best Alpaca ranch in the South West...'
This was incredible, Aardwold had won at least one prestigious award and Google search dared to question its legitimacy!
I entered the site and found that Aardwold Alpacas is in Canon city Colorado and you can 'like' it if you have a Facebook account. I have high hopes that the many million readers of this blog will choose to do this. Unfortunately I am not on Facebook and I will only join if someone can find me a group entirely devoted to the small thrill that is felt when you find the place for a jigsaw puzzle piece. Enywhey I read the first recommendation for Aardwold Alpacas:
I love going up to Aardwolf Alpacas. They have many beautiful, high quality animals/alpacas to choose from. So if you are looking to grow your herd, start your herd or learn how to take care of your alpaca herd, Phyllis and Mike at Aardwolf Alpacas is THE place to do business... the alpaca business. They are the best.
The have the best alpacas for sale in Colorado and the South West!
Sounds good, but on closer inspection that it had been posted by Mels' Card shop. Sure card shop owners are entitled to their views on Alpaca breeders, but they really should not force them on the world at large. That and they DO NOT KNOW HOW APOSTROPHES WORK!!!!!! Which annoyed me somewhat. I am quite sure this card shop does not belong to all the Mels in the world.
The next comment was even worse. The first sentence sounds perfectly normal:
Getting to know Mike and Phyllis has been an experience in learning how passionate they are in the business of Alpacas.
But! If you remove the last five words...
Getting to know Mike and Phyllis has been an experience in learning how passionate they are.
AHA! Yet another thinly disguised dating agency!! I wondered how many of these I would spring during my dictionary based exploits.
So ends another word. I may possibly do Aardwolf next time, but the first two sites seem to be about the online game so I may put it off again. Thanks for reading!!
-Kate
P.S I did a spell checker search on my above incorrect spelling of 'anyway' and one of the listed options was 'flywheel'.
Challenge time! For those who are keen enough, I will award the person who pens the best five line limerick featuring the word Dostoevsky.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Intro + Aardvark
Right...
Blogging...
It had to happen eventually, it was either start a Blog or go on Facebook. I think I chose the lesser of two evils.
Anyway, I was going to do something brilliant for this opening post but I couldn't think of anything and out of sheer desperation I started Google searching words in dictionary order, I was mildly surprised with Aardvark.
So without further ado:
Aardvark on Google:
The first web site was the wikipedia entry so I skipped that (I didn't want to learn about Aardvarks!)
The next URL was www.vark.com and the caption read.
'Ask questions, get *live* answers from your network! Aardvark finds the perfect person to answer any question in real-time.'
I was shocked, the second website Google coughs up is not actually about the lovable cuddly Aardvark!! :(
In side the site there is a text box in which you type a question, the website then apparently finds the perfect person to answer and sends you their response in a few minutes.
Of course this sounded like a challenge to me and I immidiately typed the question.
'Why?'
Unfortunately an Aardvark icon appeared with a speech bubble saying
I'm looking for a nice furry lovable sort of being to be my soul mate. Know you of such a being :P?
Maybe I should have left the :P out...
However the Aardvark understood!!!
He took me to a pop-up and said that before he could find an answer I had to sign in.
With that I understood! This was a dating site, cunningly disguised as a Q&A center. I hate dating sites. I removed the pop up and told the Aardvark we were through.
'You Bastard! How could you do such a thing to me?'
Just to rub it in he sent me to the pop-up again, I was about to furiously storm from the site when I noticed a small button entitled
Example questions
So, to try to do the site justice, I clicked it.
Aha! Example question 2 proves it! A dating site, for Usans no less!
The next site on the list was Google images, which I skipped.
It was followed by
www.awf.org > wildlife
With a subtext which read:
Provides details about the physical characteristics, diet, and habitat, of this mammal. [Orycteropus afer]
This sounded promising, maybe I could actually read about Aardvarks rather than flirt with them.
I was taken to a page with a picture of an Aardvark at night and a mass of intelligent looking writing. However I began to lose faith in the page almost instantly when I saw an ad part way through the first paragraph giving me the opportunity to strengthen Zambia's lower Zambezi national park and with a link entitled
'more action opportunities'
How dare they!!! Not only have they assumed that I support lower Zambezi, when everyone knows I root for upper Zambezi every time (Go UZ!! WOO!). But once again I have been propositioned by an Aardvark!!! NO! I do not want more action opportunities. I was seriously put off and quickly scrolled to the end of the page where I noticed a heading which perked my curiosity.
It was a 'Did you know?' section and I always love these for there magnificently quirky and amusing lesser known facts. With a beating heart I read the two facts, and was thoroughly dissapointed.
The link simply said 'aardvark' and the URL was aardvark.tce.rmit.edu.au/
I was interested already! Obviously it was a school called Aardvark although I couldn't figure out the tce.rmit bit. The sub text however put me off to know end:
'Documents the contemporary architecture of Melbourne and surrounding regions'
Arrrrgh! Not only was it a website on Australian Architecture, but it was Victorian Ewwww!
Oh, well I at least felt secure in the thought that I was unlikely to be propositioned in this site.
The site was very bland, A white background with AARDVARK written in massive letters. Underneath this it stated: The RMIT guide to contemporary Melbourne architecture. In very fancy letters (Posh tossers). So that cleared the RMIT bit up I still saw no sign of a TCE though.
There was a link further down which said Access Aardvark which was a shame because if it had said Enter the Aardvark instead I could have proved my thought from the last paragraph wrong.
Once I had Accessed Aardvark I was taken to a very posh new page which included the first part of the site which did have sexual innuendo qualities. A link entitled Norman Day's Companion Article.
The link took me to a page which contained, what they called, an introductory essay by Norman. This 'essay' however only consisted of 98 words so I don't know where they get off calling it an essay. Stupid pompous Vics always looking for the quick and easy solution, never done a days work in their lives. (I have included the essay at the end of this post). There were more links down the bottom of the page from which I could go to the next page the previous page or the home page. But, embracing the simpleness of Firefox, I just clicked the little x button at the top of the tab.
And so ends my first foray into the world of blogging. Hopefully both of the people who read this have managed to avoid giving up at some point and will come back for the next installment in which I shall Google search Aardwolf.
If for any reason you wish to comment privately to me I can be reached at:
katethepotatoman@yahoo.com.au
-Kate
The period 1970 to 1986 was one of revolutionary change in Melbourne architecture. Globally the period was marked by a critical re-appraisal of the tenets of modern[ist] architecture which was seen as aesthetically exhausted and culturally fatally flawed.
Locally, the death in 1971 of Robin Boyd, who had championed the cause of modernism and fought against what he saw as the populist excesses of suburban taste, was strongly symbolic of this paradigm shift.
By 1986 the culture of the city had been redirected and the change was reflected in a number of signpost buildings and associated architectural occurrences.
Did you enjoy that as much as I did?
Blogging...
It had to happen eventually, it was either start a Blog or go on Facebook. I think I chose the lesser of two evils.
Anyway, I was going to do something brilliant for this opening post but I couldn't think of anything and out of sheer desperation I started Google searching words in dictionary order, I was mildly surprised with Aardvark.
So without further ado:
Aardvark on Google:
The first web site was the wikipedia entry so I skipped that (I didn't want to learn about Aardvarks!)
The next URL was www.vark.com and the caption read.
'Ask questions, get *live* answers from your network! Aardvark finds the perfect person to answer any question in real-time.'
I was shocked, the second website Google coughs up is not actually about the lovable cuddly Aardvark!! :(
In side the site there is a text box in which you type a question, the website then apparently finds the perfect person to answer and sends you their response in a few minutes.
Of course this sounded like a challenge to me and I immidiately typed the question.
'Why?'
Unfortunately an Aardvark icon appeared with a speech bubble saying
Oops - that doesn't look like a question!
Now I was intrigued, the Aardvark was speaking in some kind of code, but obviously wanted me to explain my intentions. That was going to be difficult, but I worked around the problem.Please try again... Just write your question as a plain English sentence, like you would to a friend.
What!!! I did phrase it as I would a friend!!! I reasoned that the Aardvark must be lonely so I promptly asked:
'Are you doing anything later?'
Once again the helpful Aardvark appeared saying:
'Oops - that question is too short for Aardvark!
Try adding more detail so people know what you're looking for…'
I'm looking for a nice furry lovable sort of being to be my soul mate. Know you of such a being :P?
Maybe I should have left the :P out...
However the Aardvark understood!!!
He took me to a pop-up and said that before he could find an answer I had to sign in.
With that I understood! This was a dating site, cunningly disguised as a Q&A center. I hate dating sites. I removed the pop up and told the Aardvark we were through.
'You Bastard! How could you do such a thing to me?'
Just to rub it in he sent me to the pop-up again, I was about to furiously storm from the site when I noticed a small button entitled
Example questions
So, to try to do the site justice, I clicked it.
- Product recommendations…
What’s the best iPhone app to get breaking news reports? - Local activities…
Does anyone have any suggestions for a fun weekend activity in Philadelphia, PA? - Book suggestions…
Can anyone recommend a great book about value investing that’s easily understandable to a newbie? - Travel tips…
I’m going to Berlin for two weeks and would like to take some day trips to places that aren’t too touristy. Where should I go? - Gift ideas…
Any ideas for a graduation gift? I want to give my friend something that lasts, but someone already gave her jewelry. What else could I give her? - Getting started on a project…
How do I go about finding out if my invention is patentable?
Aha! Example question 2 proves it! A dating site, for Usans no less!
The next site on the list was Google images, which I skipped.
It was followed by
www.awf.org > wildlife
With a subtext which read:
Provides details about the physical characteristics, diet, and habitat, of this mammal. [Orycteropus afer]
This sounded promising, maybe I could actually read about Aardvarks rather than flirt with them.
I was taken to a page with a picture of an Aardvark at night and a mass of intelligent looking writing. However I began to lose faith in the page almost instantly when I saw an ad part way through the first paragraph giving me the opportunity to strengthen Zambia's lower Zambezi national park and with a link entitled
'more action opportunities'
How dare they!!! Not only have they assumed that I support lower Zambezi, when everyone knows I root for upper Zambezi every time (Go UZ!! WOO!). But once again I have been propositioned by an Aardvark!!! NO! I do not want more action opportunities. I was seriously put off and quickly scrolled to the end of the page where I noticed a heading which perked my curiosity.
It was a 'Did you know?' section and I always love these for there magnificently quirky and amusing lesser known facts. With a beating heart I read the two facts, and was thoroughly dissapointed.
- The aardvark has fewer teeth than most mammals. The teeth are columnar in shape, have no roots and do not grow simultaneously.
- Although not thought to be teritorial, females seem to become attached to a particular place. The males wander more. Adult aardvarks are usually solitary, coming together only for mating.
The link simply said 'aardvark' and the URL was aardvark.tce.rmit.edu.au/
I was interested already! Obviously it was a school called Aardvark although I couldn't figure out the tce.rmit bit. The sub text however put me off to know end:
'Documents the contemporary architecture of Melbourne and surrounding regions'
Arrrrgh! Not only was it a website on Australian Architecture, but it was Victorian Ewwww!
Oh, well I at least felt secure in the thought that I was unlikely to be propositioned in this site.
The site was very bland, A white background with AARDVARK written in massive letters. Underneath this it stated: The RMIT guide to contemporary Melbourne architecture. In very fancy letters (Posh tossers). So that cleared the RMIT bit up I still saw no sign of a TCE though.
There was a link further down which said Access Aardvark which was a shame because if it had said Enter the Aardvark instead I could have proved my thought from the last paragraph wrong.
Once I had Accessed Aardvark I was taken to a very posh new page which included the first part of the site which did have sexual innuendo qualities. A link entitled Norman Day's Companion Article.
The link took me to a page which contained, what they called, an introductory essay by Norman. This 'essay' however only consisted of 98 words so I don't know where they get off calling it an essay. Stupid pompous Vics always looking for the quick and easy solution, never done a days work in their lives. (I have included the essay at the end of this post). There were more links down the bottom of the page from which I could go to the next page the previous page or the home page. But, embracing the simpleness of Firefox, I just clicked the little x button at the top of the tab.
And so ends my first foray into the world of blogging. Hopefully both of the people who read this have managed to avoid giving up at some point and will come back for the next installment in which I shall Google search Aardwolf.
If for any reason you wish to comment privately to me I can be reached at:
katethepotatoman@yahoo.com.au
-Kate
The period 1970 to 1986 was one of revolutionary change in Melbourne architecture. Globally the period was marked by a critical re-appraisal of the tenets of modern[ist] architecture which was seen as aesthetically exhausted and culturally fatally flawed.
Locally, the death in 1971 of Robin Boyd, who had championed the cause of modernism and fought against what he saw as the populist excesses of suburban taste, was strongly symbolic of this paradigm shift.
By 1986 the culture of the city had been redirected and the change was reflected in a number of signpost buildings and associated architectural occurrences.
Did you enjoy that as much as I did?
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